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"Hello!
My name is Michael J. Bernard, and I was alerted to your existance by your myspace friend "__________" yesterday
and am submiting the following stories for either the internet or print version of Throwrag----
I am actually going to include two right off the top, since the one I wrote specifically for you (THE MOMENT OF TRUTH)
may be too long for the print version....I thought it would have been sorta cheap to use the very blog I thought inspired
"...apply blossom" to recommend your fine zine (COMFORT, THE RUE OF THE CRUCIBLE), and since from what I saw I like
your sensibilities, I thought you deserved a new piece.......
Also COMFORT may have a few sentences that are too self-depreciating (and a couple more that were too self-aggrandizing)
for the zine, PLUS, as a former-sometime editor(more like compiler since I don't even edit my own shit) of my on-again-off-again
literary eine/zine/anthology, I HATE to publish things that are exclusively about writing/publishing since it kinda seems
redundant to me......
I've got so much material laying around that if you don't really like either piece let me know and I can keep sending
you crap till you find something you like. I rip off about a story a day at least, two yesterday, more if I need to, so the
law of averages seems to be on the side of EVENTUALLY there being sometihing that fits your intended style.....I have to admit
the wording of this next statement had me somewhat confused, ""a fine literary journal of non-objectional prose
freshly dredged from the hudson and ready for your consumption."-----almost everything I write (also Buk from what I
have read) is highly objectional to someone.....so maybe I WONT have anything you like but I doubt it.....I've even got a
literary historical fiction project that is just hemoragging random stories here and there so if you guys like that I've got
those too.....mostly for zines/ezines I like to send my poetry and true-life crime/drug/romance dramas since they are not
doing well in print submissions for me (no one cares about your crimes, drug excapades, or failed romances until they know
who you ARE---ask BUK, when you get to the afterlife, he knows what I'm talking about, as I am sure you do if you've been
doing this for as long as I have....)
this has to be the longest cover letter I've ever written but I've been up for two days straight, have written 4 pieces
and gotten drunk like 3 times and am now coming down and delerious......also feel free to publish corrospondances with me
(especially when they are this odd and inspired) in whole or in part in whatever venue you like....."
So here is our new friend and his lovely letter.
I like him.
Let us know what you guys think of him. Hopefully we'll have more of his work in upcoming issues and projects.
and hopefully we'll get more of his letters.
Comfort, the Rue of the Crucible (Art at the Speed of Light)
You Pick.
About the Author.
1)Michael J. Bernard is a Noble House Poet Fellow, a Distinguished Member of the International Society of Poets, internationally
accliamed writer, award-winning painter, and archetypical theorist. Bernard teaches at Auburn University, and his first two
book length works, Maya and Return, will be available soon from Phoenix Fire Multimedia.
2)Michael J. Bernard is a known criminal undesireable on the lam from multiple law enforcement agencies and protectors
of the Literary Tradition. When he is not stalking unsuspecting females, he sporratically creates highly-offensive art and
contributes to the decline of Western Civilization. His first two book length works, Maya and Return, will be available soon
from Phoenix Fire Multimedia.
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